smothered hope

it feel spointless these days 16.04.08 9:08 p.m.

I'm starting to believe I'm the awful person people tell me I am.

I'm really not sure what to do anymore. People close to me tell me it's not true, that I'm a good person, no worse than anyone else. But if that's true, why do I fail so often? Why does it seem like everyone's always angry with me? I feel like all I do is for the benefit of others, and when I try to benefit myself, I piss everyone else off.

But if everyone's so pissed with me, I must be doing it wrong. I must be some kind of asshole.

I don't want to hate myself.

back | forth

listening:
reading:
ingesting:
(see entries before 20.11.05)

previously on Smothered Hope:

unreal - 20.05.08
in which our narrator kinda just babbles on a bit - 15.05.08
drank several margaritas last night. they were great. - 04.05.08
spacey - 29.04.08
i will most definitely regret posting this in public - 28.04.08

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